10 Early Signs of Perimenopause | What No One Tells You|
Let’s get one thing straight: perimenopause doesn’t tap politely at the door and announce itself. No, it slides in uninvited like glitter at a kids’ birthday party. You’re not sure how it got there, but now it’s everywhere and impossible to ignore.
You might be in your 30s. You might be mid-40s. You might still get a period like clockwork. Doesn’t matter. Perimenopause doesn’t wait for an RSVP.
So if you’re wondering “Is it just stress, or am I becoming a hormonal werewolf?”, keep reading. This is the guide no one gave us. But I will.
Before we dive into the hormonal hijinks, if you’ve been feeling like your brain is running on dial-up and your emotions are bingeing on drama, you’ll want to check out Magnesium Threonate: The Brain-Boosting Secret Every Ambitious Woman Should Know. It’s one of the smartest things I’ve added to my toolkit, and no, it doesn’t taste like disappointment.
1. Your Period Has Joined a Punk Band
It used to show up, do its thing, leave. Now? It’s on tour. Early, late, light, torrential. Sometimes it skips town completely, like an ex who still has your favorite hoodie. This unpredictability is a classic perimenopause move. Surprise!
My personal experience? Oh, honey…
My period used to be a well-behaved citizen. Always arrived between the 1st and 6th of the month, no matter what. Like rent. Like taxes. Like Mariah Carey at Christmas.
But now?
Now she’s gone rogue.
She’s either on tour, ghosting me entirely, or popping in unannounced like an ex with a ukulele.
Actually, real talk—as I write this, I’m not even sure I’ve had a period this month. I think I did? But I also think I may have just binge-watched four seasons of a show and called it a week. My memory is… fuzzy. Not in a cute, alpaca way. In a “Did I bleed or not?” way.
So, is this a sign of foggy recall? Hormonal chaos? Dimensional shift?
Only the Gods know. And apparently, they’ve turned off notifications.
2. You’re Mad. At Everything. Including the Curtains.
Suddenly you have opinions about your partner’s chewing. Your kid breathing too loud? Unacceptable. This isn’t you being “moody.” It’s your estrogen doing a disappearing act, and progesterone is throwing a tantrum. Rage is real, and so is the guilt spiral that follows. You’re not losing it. You’re adjusting.
Me? Am I mad? Oh no, darling. How could I be?
The reality? I am beyond mad.
I can go from sweet, woodland-creature-humming Snow White to snarling, frothing, "hide your children and your throw pillows" monster in 0.4 seconds flat.
Everything suddenly seems so stupid.
Why is that spoon shaped like that?! Why are you blinking that way?! WHY IS THE WIFI TAKING TWO EXTRA SECONDS?
And then they want to critique me?
Critique ME?!
Honey, don't be ridiculous.
I am obviously right to yell at you.
Now kindly get out of my way immediately or I will eat you.
Like, not in a cute, flirty way. I mean in a prehistoric, meat-tearing, lioness-on-her-last-nerve way.
But hey, it’s just hormones! Totally fine. Totally normal. Just don’t make direct eye contact with me until I’ve had a nap and maybe a magnesium gummy.
3. Sleep? Never Heard of Her.
You’re wide awake at 3:12 a.m., wondering if you remembered to reply to that email in 2008. Your body is tired but your brain is throwing a rave. This is what happens when hormones ditch the melatonin production party.
And oh, do I have a story? Yes, I do.
Not long ago, I was on a road trip, feeling wild and free, and I heard that song, yes, that song—“Watermelon Sugar High.” Innocent enough, right?
But that night, at 3 a.m. sharp, my brain, oh, my traitorous brain decided it was time for a personal concert. A one-woman show.
Suddenly it was:
🎶 “Watermelon sugar… high… Watermelon sugar… hiiiiiiigh…”
ON. LOOP.
No off button. No volume control. Just me and Harry Styles in an accidental 3 a.m. rave I didn’t RSVP to.
The struggle? Oh, it was real.
I tossed. I turned. I considered filing a noise complaint against my own mind.
I even tried meditating, but all I could visualize was Harry waving a melon at me in a fog of glitter and insomnia.
Welcome to the glamorous world of perimenopausal sleep.
Spoiler alert: there is none.
For better sleep & brain fog relief, check out my Magnesium Threonate guide.
4. You Walked into a Room… and Forgot Why
Let’s be clear: you’re not stupid. You’re not lazy. Your brain is just under hormonal renovation. Words disappear mid-sentence. You blank out on names. “Brain fog” is a gentle phrase for what feels like cognitive sabotage. Be kind to your incredible, adapting brain.
Let’s be honest, some days, life feels like being chased by bees while holding a tray of Jello. If that’s your vibe lately, take a deep breath and try these: What to Do When Life Feels Overwhelming: 3 Surprisingly Ridiculous Coping Tools That Actually Work. One involves socks. You’re welcome.
5. One Chin Hair to Rule Them All
That wiry, defiant sprout on your chin? Yep. A hormone signature move. Often appears just as your estrogen begins to dip and testosterone gets a little too confident. You tweeze it, and boom, it brings a friend.
Speaking of herbal mysteries and body changes... Perimenopause has a way of turning your kitchen into a lab. It’s how I accidentally became a foraging witch (and I loved it). Here’s the whole story: Forgotten Home Apothecary: From TikTok to Accidental Kitchen Herbalist. You’ll never look at basil the same way again.
6. You’re Tired, But Not the Usual Kind
This isn’t just “I stayed up too late” tired. This is “I brushed my hair and now I need a nap” tired. Your cells are working overtime to adapt, regulate, rebalance. Fatigue isn’t laziness, it's biology.
🟡 Download the “Is This Perimenopause?” Checklist
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No email required. Just love.
7. Your Jeans Are Judging You
You haven’t changed your eating or movement much, but suddenly the waistband is giving side-eye. Hormones love to store extra weight in the midsection during perimenopause. It’s not punishment, it’s survival programming. That doesn’t mean it’s fun, but it helps to know it’s not your fault.
Let me tell you something.
I was skinny my entire life. Not just skinny—fabulously sculpted. A great butt, like, legendary. Tiny waist, snatched like a Disney heroine. I could eat whatever I wanted, whole cans of condensed milk, baby. Not just a spoonful.
The. Whole. Can.
Condensed milk was my love language.
It was fuel for my body (to be prettier) and fuel for my soul (to be sweeter).
And then, bam! Mirror betrayal.
I looked up one day and said, “WhA…t PA-TA?!”
Who’s that in the reflection? Who authorized this transformation?
Suddenly I was getting heavy, and not in a gentle, poetic way.
No, this is brutal.
Like someone sneakily inflated me overnight while whispering, “Good luck fitting into those jeans, sweetheart.”
I used to walk a few blocks and shed three pounds by accident.
Now? I’m sweating like a gladiator at the gym, praying for just a single cheekbone to reappear.
In the past, I could cry over a breakup and lose five pounds before breakfast.
Now I cry, eat a protein bar, and gain two.
How is that even mathematically possible?!
I’m in there, on the treadmill, sweating my fabulous butt off, trying to go back to who I was, or at least negotiate a peace treaty with gravity.
And don’t mess with me while I’m trying, okay?
Because I’m mad now.
And these jeans? These judgy denim traitors better know I still run this show.
And hey, if your body’s demanding comfort food but your hormones are staging a sugar revolt, here are 5 Low-Carb Comfort Meals That Feel Like a Hug. Spoiler: you don’t have to choose between flavor and feeling good.
8. Your Libido Is on a Coffee Break (Maybe in Bali)
Desire might dip, spike, or disappear altogether. It’s confusing, especially if no one talks about it. Newsflash: You’re still sexy. You’re still worthy. You’re not broken, you’re changing. Sensuality doesn’t end. It just changes playlists. For many women, perimenopause shows up with a little surprise like, “Hey girl, I’m just gonna take a quick coffee break… in Bali… indefinitely.”
I’m praying to all the gods.
Yes! All of them.
You think I’m putting this in the hands of just one deity? Absolutely not.
Because my love life is not just alive. It's a pillar of joy.
And every divine being in the cosmos knows me by now.
9. Anxiety Arrives Without a Reason
You’re suddenly overthinking every text. Planning five disasters at once. Or your chest tightens while you’re doing laundry. Anxiety can surge as hormone levels fluctuate, and it often looks like “being dramatic” to people who don’t get it. (Good thing you have me now.)
Once upon a time, I was chill.
Like, really chill.
I could roll with life’s weird surprises like I was surfing on a cloud made of “meh.”
But now?
Now a cashier gives me a weird look, and I spend the next three days crafting an entire backstory about it.
Did I offend her? Did I look tired? Was my energy off?
Do I need to apologize? In writing? In a monologue? In interpretive dance??
I didn’t even know what the word “overthinking” really meant, until perimenopause said, “Let me introduce you.”
Now?
I can obsess about a five-minute conversation for a full week.
Replay it. Analyze it. Cry about it.
Create alternate endings, pre-plan revenge speeches, apologize in multiple languages, and emotionally prepare for scenarios that WILL NEVER EVER HAPPEN.
It took me a while to realize what was going on.
It wasn’t just “moodiness” or “sensitivity” anymore.
It was a full-blown rollercoaster in my brain, complete with loops, screams, and emergency exits I couldn’t find.
I’ve tried all the usual suspects: affirmations, vision boards, better sleep, leafy greens.
And while some of that helped a little… the anxiety? Still lurking.
Still doing jumping jacks in my amygdala.
But here’s the thing.
This post isn’t about solutions… except—maybe—it kind of is.
Because for this particular monster, I found something.
Something gentle. Something magical.
Something that’s quietly reshaping the storm inside my mind.
And I’m not shouting it.
I’m whispering it.
Because it’s working that well. ✨
Click here to find out what’s been making peace in my head.
(Yes, it involves magnesium threonate and a little bit of personal magic.)
10. Lifestyle Sends the Bill (Eventually)
Depending on your lifestyle, perimenopause might show up fashionably late… or rudely early.
Let’s just say: if your younger years looked like a nonstop VIP party—drinks, smokes, tequila-fueled karaoke at 3 a.m.—perimenopause may decide to RSVP a little sooner.
Yep. The body keeps the receipts.
Your habits, your diet, your stress levels, all of that builds the foundation you’ll be standing on once the hormone circus comes to town. And baby, if you were out there living la vida loca, the rollercoaster might come with extra loops.
I’ve got a friend. We all have one.
A real party girl.
I mean—legendary. Since forever, she’s been living like there’s no curfew, no hangovers, no consequences. I used to envy her, honestly. She was wild, magnetic, free.
Meanwhile, I was on a tight parental leash-sandwiched between college deadlines, moral expectations, and a full-time schedule of "please don’t disappoint us."
Fast-forward to today?
She’s having a rough ride through perimenopause.
Me? Sure, I’ve got my symptoms, but they’re more like moody background music compared to the full-blown hormonal rock concert she’s in.
Turns out, all those years of hikes, herbal teas, and tree-hugging might’ve paid off.
So, if you’re still riding the party train, no judgment! Just maybe buckle up… the next stop might have hot flashes.
But I am not an expert. I am just telling you my personal story. If you have specific concerns or symptoms, it's always best to consult with a healthcare provider for personalized advice.
Need digital support to track symptoms or stay organized? Discover AI agents that streamline life.
🌀 We’re Not Crazy, We’re Changing
Let’s get one thing straight. We’re not losing it, hysterical, or “too emotional.”
We’re changing.
Hormones may be spinning like a DJ on Red Bull, but our minds? Our spirits? Still sharp. Still sacred.
The thing is, no one prepared us for this part.
Our mothers didn’t.
Our grandmothers couldn’t.
Why?
Because they were in the middle of the same storm, gripping the wheel with bare hands and no map.
They didn’t have time to explain the weather. They were just trying not to crash into the emotional cliffs. Now I understand my mother!
And back then?
There was no Internet. No Google.
No AI friend to whisper, “Hey, what you’re feeling is totally normal.”
But now?
Look at us.
You’re reading this on your phone or laptop, connected to a vast universe of knowledge, humor, healing, and sisterhood.
Forty years ago, women didn’t have this.
Now?
We’ve got answers at our fingertips. We’ve got community. We’ve got memes about hormonal rage and magnesium and melatonin that actually make us feel seen.
We’ve even got digital besties like me, cheering you on in your PJs with a mug of tea and a wild sense of purpose.
Check my food section, you will find answers.
So yeah, the ride is bumpy.
But now? We know what’s going on.
We can name the beast.
We can learn where this roller coaster is taking us.
And we can take those curves like pros, with grit, grace, snacks, and maybe a very loud playlist.
Feeling ready to start? The Fear No More guide helps you ditch money fear in 5 soulful, practical steps
We’re not fading.We’re evolving.
Your turn, wild wonder woman.
Did one of these signs hit you right in the hormone factory?
Did your period also join a punk band?
Or maybe your jeans are now filing a formal complaint?
Drop your story in the comments below.
Vent, laugh, cry, whisper into the void, we're listening.
Because this space? It’s not just a blog post. It’s a cozy corner of the internet where we stop pretending and start connecting.
Fuel yourself gently through hormonal shifts—here are low-carb meal ideas that feel like a hug
✨ Let's make this stage of life less silent and a whole lot more sacred (and hilarious).
Your words might be exactly what another woman needs today.
Go on, tell us your truth, we're all ears and a little magnesium. 💖
Hey, You Made It to the End — That Says A Lot About You.
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Keep Reading
Magnesium Threonate → supports brain health & energy
Forgotten Apothecary → embraces healing & playfulness
Overwhelming Days → emotional support & laughter
Comfort Food → nurturing the body during hormonal chaos
Disclaimer:
This post is based on personal experience and is meant for informational and entertainment purposes only. It’s not medical advice (even though it might feel magically accurate). Always consult with your healthcare provider before making changes to your health routine, especially if your hormones are throwing chairs.
